The Breast Cancer 3 Day Walk!

Okay...so I am a bit late in saying to the world....we finished!

But somehow I don't think the world was waiting breathlessly to read of my Breast Cancer 3 Day Walk experience! But hell...here it is anyway...we finished!!!

My sister-in-law and I have decided that this experience was like childbirth...you swear at the end you are never going to do it again. And then about 1 week later, after sharing the experience, you decided it would be so great to do again! Because the next time you would know what to expect and be PREPARED!

SO...let me tell you....it was GRUELING! 3 Days....60 miles...coupled with camping out. First let me just share that I am not a "camping out" kinda gal. I am not an unusually girlie girl, and love the outdoors, but don't enjoy sleeping out there. For a person who likes to keep bodily functions mysterious, camping just doesn't do it.
But we had to camp out! That was part of the gig...okay...bring it on.

The Susan G. Komen organizers have this stuff down!!! They are masters at this walk and go out of their way to make you feel WONDERFUL about beating the shit out of your body for 3 days! The enthusiasm of the crowd (I called it the group psychology) is what gets you through. They have it set up so you can stop for potty breaks (porta potties mind you...another of my camper's nightmares) and drinks and snacks approximately every 3 miles.
Our mentality THEN became, "I can't walk 20 miles at once, but I CAN WALK 3 miles", seven times! Brilliant! Whoever thought that up should get a goddamn raise!

And on the first day, as we were coming close to our campsite, I said to Alena, "surely they would not make a bunch of girls, who probably don't really dig camping anyway, and who have just walked 8 -1/2 hours straight, put up their own tents...surely NOT huh?" And before she could answer...we walked into camp amid CHEERS for our accomplishment and there was a sea of pink tents! And I said Hallelujah! Thank God....and then Alena said, "Why all the empty spots in between pink tents" "Shit...we ARE tent builders." Luckily we looked exhausted and pitiful enough that a wonderful male volunteer helped us. (translation... we watched him do it)

So....hot showers in the mobile 18 wheeler truck, a nice hot meal and some camaraderie in the big tent, and sleeping in balmy 40 degree weather!
"Damn it's cold, whose idea was this anyway" I asked Alena. "Yours bitch...go to sleep", she laughed.

But together we raised over $6,000 ! The last day was especially grueling, but we decided the night before, amidst speeches from breast cancer survivors and a bunch of Rah Rah Rah's, that we were going to make it through! And we did! Our feet wrapped in duct tape...yep....duct tape helps keep away the blisters! Alena did end up with a blister so big that it looked as if her pinkie toe had an "ass". But she refused to take her shoes off so that she could not see what damage she was doing to her feet!

Would I do it again! Absolutely! I never thought I could, and now I know I can do whatever I set my mind to! And if our fund raising helps women with breast cancer, or helps prevent a woman from getting breast cancer...then blisters be damned!

God I love the Internet!

God...I love the Internet!
I am trying to be a fledgling artist...to try and be brave and actually show some of my photography off to those other than my immediate family. I bumped into http://www.artistrising.com/ , a website for artists to showcase their work.
Cool enough...but I have figured out...and I know you all already know this...but I can link my photo gallery I created there to this blog here! WOW!
Sometimes I feel so OLD and out of it....even though I am NOT OLD!
UGH!
So to shamelessly recap...
If you want to go and see my fledgling group of photographs for sale...go to
http://www.artistrising.com/galleries/tracyworkman

And enjoy!

Trying to let the creative come out!

Okay....so I am trying slowly to let the creative seep out. I joined www.artistrising.com and put up some of my photographs for viewing and for sale. They are also on www.Sistino.com!
I want to unleash the creative side of me on the rest of the world, even though they may not know or care about my creative side! It helps me feel connected to more of the outside world and makes me stick my neck out! Even if just a little bit!
Here goes nothing...

We did it!

My sister in law and I finally raised the minimum amount needed to participate in the Breast Cancer 3 Day walk Oct. 26-28, 2007. We were actually blessed to raise more than needed...which is just a bonus for us and for the charity! We wanted to participate and are excited we beat our goal! When it was clutch time...my father in law came through with flying colors! He sent out e-mails on our behave to tons of his friends, business associates, acquaintances, and everyone else who might have owed him one. It worked! It put us over the top so that now all we have to focus on is walking...ugh...yea...ugh!
It is only about 3 weeks away and training is critical! I have been hoofing it outdoors more to be able to get used to walking amongst the traffic, dogs, different paths, etc. I feel good and also feel scared! This is an important personal goal for me...one I am determined to accomplish!

Breast Cancer 3 Day Walk

I cannot tell you how excited I am to be participating in this walk! People I know have been so generous and so far I have raised a bit more than 1/2 needed to participate! I am hoping to raise more than that to be able to be a good supporter of the cause.
My sister-in-law and I are in training mode... which also includes occasional doses of chocolate for me ...and are psyched about an upcoming training walk!
It will be a test and I really want to feel like I can handle it.
Can I handle it? 20 miles a day for 3 days? of course I can...train, train, train and I am relying on the group psychology for extra motivation during the walk.
Thank you to all those who have donated and keep the donations coming....it is for a great cause and also helps a couple of good hearted girls do the right thing!

The Breast Cancer 3 Day Walk!

My sister-in-law Alena and I are going on a wonderful adventure together! We have signed up to do the Susan G. Koman Breast Cancer 3 day walk in Dallas/Ft. Worth , Texas Oct 26-28,2007.
We wanted to do something outrageous together! Being able to raise money for such a wonderful cause and meet so many new and wonderful people...and walk our Asses off sounded perfect to us!
http://www.the3day.org/dallas07/workmanangel
This is my web page for the event where you can donate! Anything you can give would be greatly appreciated.
We have to raise at least $2200.00 each and would love to raise more!
Everyone knows someone...family or friend who has been affected by the devastation of cancer...including us!
My step-father died in 2000 from Bone Cancer....a very painful type of cancer. He was a wonderful man who did not deserve such a painful death! He faced it with dignity and humor, but with much sadness too. You see....he knew I was pregnant and was so excited about this grandchild...but passed away 7 months before the baby arrived.
I cannot tell you how much sadness I feel that my son will never get to meet this wonderful man...and vice versa!
So...I wanted to get more involved in helping any way I could in the fight against all types of cancers!
So please...give if you can....every little bit helps and will be Greatly Appreciated!
Cheers!

Communication

Over the years many different characteristics have been labeled the "it" factor for a successful relationship. "Trust", "Honesty", "Faithfulness". Sometimes we were counseled by books, magazines, and TV to be more selfish..."can't take care of someone else until you take care of yourself". Then it was selflessness..."putting others needs first feels good and gives your karma a boost". Good communication has also been in that mix over the years as well. "You need good communication in order to have a successful relationship". But...the experts either did not explain what good communication was...or... it was analyzed to death until it completely lost meaning. Kinda like this essay...feels like it's drifting off to nowhere in particular... Oh...that's right...communication as the Holy Grail in a successful relationship. Another bland and undefined phrase..."successful relationship"...too broad a term to get my head around sometimes. Does it mean we are happy? Does it mean we have been together a long time? Does it mean we are happy we have been together a long time? What? I think, and strictly my small contribution to society is "good communication" means... I say something of value to you, you clearly understand what I was saying by conveying what you heard back to me...somehow. I ackowledge the fact that you were listening and let you make your point about the subject matter and I actively listen to what you have to say. Rinse and Repeat!

I can't believe he really listened!

Okay...
so the three of us were at Home Depot yesterday...(myself, husband, and 6 year old son) buying gardening "stuff"...you know...soil, chemicals, tools....the fun, dirty stuff.
As my son and I wait just outside of the gardening center for my husband to pull the truck around...(yes...we are semi- yuppies with 8 acres and a pick up truck alongside our Volkswagen Jetta...) I notice a woman, by herself, loading large bags of mulch and sections of concrete garden borders into her pick up truck. I decide it is the neighborly thing to do to help her load up...and this will also be a good place for my husband to pull in to get our dirt goods loaded up.
So...while my motives are two-fold...
my 6 year old jumps in and decides he is going to help as well!
I would like to think we have pounded good manners into him for the past 6 years and so perhaps it is kicking in...good for me...when he goes WAY past good manners and proceeds to tell this nice lady that "my mama always taught me that if I see someone who needs help, I should help them". I almost cried right there in front of the Home Depot!
She smiled at him sweetly and thanked us both!
I could not have been prouder!

Summer Vacation

Wow!
My son just finished his first year of formal school....the amazing kindergarten!
When I was in kindergarten...(don't ask ), it was a place to go to give my mom a 1/2 day break from her precocious angel, and for us to learn all the wonderful ways to use paste...artwork, snack, hair gel...you know!
Now...by the time my son "graduated" kindergarten...he was supposed to be able to read...on some level...and he did!
I was amazed and astounded throughout the year as we practiced "reading" that he really WAS reading!
It has been a wonderful thing to see another world open up to him...the world of words and stories! For him to get a hint at the idea that he can go ANYWHERE by reading!
And now in summer vacation....
It is my job to make sure he continues on this wonderful adventure he has begun in kindergarten (and before that...really)...so he can continue his progress in learning and...
NOT be behind when he enters 1st Grade! (Ha!)

Mortality

Sounding like an upbeat post to you????
Not really...
We have a family friend (actually my in-laws good friends and neighbors) that are going through the ultimate test. She was diagnosed with cancer quite a few months ago, perhaps a year. At first it was thought she would not take any type of treatment, but then she found out her daughter- in- law was pregnant with their first grandchild and like a trooper she was on the chemo roller coaster...experimental treatments included! This woman and her husband are such wonderful people and it is difficult to see them go through this. They both exemplify the ideal qualities such as grace, genteel spirit, kindness, humor, a love of learning, friendship, family, faith...so much so that when you are around them you cannot help but to try and mimic these same qualities. Now don't get me wrong, I am sure they have their faults, as everyone does, but because they are the way they are...their friends easily overlook their faults.
It actually makes me physically ill thinking about this wonderful man, who adores his wife, having to face the remainder of his life without her. Snd her having to come to some type of peace with what's happening to her. I suppose it reminds me that we are all mortal and I have to also face my mortality and that of my husband. And that scares the hell out of me! I know we are not suppose to dwell on our mortality...but something like this forces you too. Damn!
They finally called in Hospice for her recently and I cannot even imagine having to swallow that dose of reality.
I was recently fired from a job I had for almost five years...it was out of the blue, not performance related, but a personality conflict and I was angry! I mean "not me", "how could they", "how dare they" angry! But in light of this reality... I am humbled.
I am humbled .

My Kid

Last week my five year old was in a unusually agreeable mood for 3 straight days! Now I don't know if you know the significance of this...
but let me tell you it was BIG!
My son is a really good kid even day to day...but let's face it...he's 5 years old! Most of the time a 5 year old is sort of like a psychotic beginning medication. A moody, disagreeable, sweet, tender, funny, nasty, silly little creature who can simultaneously bring you to tears, laughter, and gross you out! Being a good parent and trying to raise a decent human being is life greatest challenge...so when you get a couple of days of "unusually agreeable" it is something worth writing about! Are there others out there who have experienced this? Why is this not in the mommy handbook? I was taken completely off guard by my little person's imitation of the Dahli Lama. I was unprepared for No mini tantrums, No arguments, No whining...so it actually took a couple of days for the realization to kick it. (I must confess that for a few hours on the third day I actually started to attribute this delightfully easy boy to my outstanding parenting skills.) Then I woke up! And so did he! 3 days was about all he had in him...and then my usual capricious 5 year old returned!
I had to put it down here though to remind myself it really did take place and perhaps that congenial little person will return soon!

Ice Storm...Day 3!

Wow...
A little bit of family sometimes goes a long way................
We got 5" of rain over the weekend...along with some cold weather. So we really did not venture out all weekend. And by Sunday night, we found out an ice storm was heading for Austin. Unusual for our neck of the woods...but it happens every couple of years. By the time we woke up Monday morning...it was below freezing temps and although I could have gotten to work, I knew it would be hard coming home! More precip was falling and turning to sleet. So Monday at home with husband and 5 year old son was a fun "Snow Day"! We went out that morning to garner supplies...of course I forgot the most important items...cookies and anything chocolate! Bitch!
Tuesday was day 2 and we were getting a bit of cabin fever...but about noon time it started to snow! Beautiful, large, fluffly flakes and it was so lovely and quiet! My son was in awe! We hoped to be able to go back to our routine Wednesday...okay I hoped really really badly...but nope...more sleet, rain , and more ice...more ice...more ice! Almost busted my ass outside the garage door. Definitely not a pretty site! By this time, we are not quite in the "Snow day" kind of mood! The chocolate ran out Tuesday afternoon and with no reinforcements, I was not mommy of the year! "No dessert momma?"
But we have made it through Wednesday...my husband nearly pushed me over on his way to school tonight. He was in desperate need of some alone time and "other people" time.
Me too...I love my family...but 5 days inside with them was enough for me. Momma needs some Mommy time!

Off Key

I hear the sound of my voice and though I am speaking out loud, it still sounds alien and unfamiliar. To my ears the sound is tinny and slightly off key. And far, far away. Perhaps this is a reliable clue to the fact that I am not myself. Off kilter... perhaps to the left, I think. But then, what the hell do I know? Today... not much. Perhaps the inconsistency has more to do with my disposition than the reverberations of the voice in my head. And the feeling I have today of being far removed from myself comes from...?

Hope

Hope...a word that brings to mind a vast array of emotions and images to anyone who hears it. Definition wise... "a feeling that what is wanted will happen; desire accompanied by expectation." It can have religious connotations of faith and belief, the anticipation and desire of lovers, or the longings and dreams of an artist. Wish...opportunity...conviction...aspiration...trust.
All words synonymous with hope. Often times we frivolously hope for concrete things...I need... I want... I deserve. But hope has a genuineness symbolizing so much more. It's deeper in it's essence than just the mere "I hope this or that" we spout off daily. It is a word full of endless possibilities...a work in progress. Hope is what keeps us motivated to do and be. It's what gives passion to our very existence. If you have hope, there is inevitably a chance for tomorrow. As if a higher power were helping guide your destiny...albeit haphazardly at times. Having hope promises the greatest joys you can imagine, or perhaps the deepest sorrows when your desires take a detour your expectations didn't know about. Nevertheless, experiencing both joy and sorrow is how you know you are truly alive. You cannot know one without the other. However, in order to fulfill wishes and dreams, the hope you have must be accompanied by some kind of movement. Hope alone without action is hollow. But when the two are joined, the potential is limitless...

New Year's Thoughts

Happy New Year!
Our little 3 person family went to a friend's party for New Years last night. I was a bit apprehensive b/c I only knew the host. It was a kid friendly New Year's party and I can tell you that I never ever thought I would enjoy a kid friendly event of any kind so much. I suppose your values change once you have a kid...and realize the world is not always kid friendly!
I had forgotten how much I like meeting and laughing with new people...and how much I enjoyed watching my son play with new friends. My husband was quite the culinary hit with his scrumptious appetizer and dessert...(he is currently attending culinary academy so my contribution to his food treats was that I am helping to pay for the tuition! Good enough for me....